tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17730948375720308382024-02-20T10:41:39.135-08:00Find The BeautyAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-46065088898217762322017-04-21T17:29:00.002-07:002017-04-21T17:30:01.644-07:00The Struggle.<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Hello.</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">I have had these thoughts running through my head
so many times and have been trying to find the words to type it out so it makes sense to those who may read this. Maybe only those who have been through
an eating disorder will understand or maybe not. I’m not really sure. I find
myself struggling and thought I would take a moment to be vulnerable. Show
everyone I am human. I am not perfect and there are days that I struggle. </span><span style="font-size: 12pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Choice.</b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yes, I overcame an eating disorder and I am proud to say
that. What people don’t understand sometimes is that it can be hard some days.
There are times when I am down on myself and these thoughts of how I don’t have
the "perfect body", I should workout more, or eat less run through my mind… but
then I have to consciously stop myself… I stop and make <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">the choice</i> to be healthy and love myself. I make the choice to keep
following the road I am on to be the best version of myself that I can be.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Balance.</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have been working out and eating healthy and you may think
this is easy for me but what you don’t know is how hard it can be to find <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">balance </i>sometimes<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">. </i>When I am working out there are days when I have to consciously tell
myself that what I am doing is okay because I ate today and I am doing this to
be healthy and fit. Cutting out junk food and sweets can be hard<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i>because that’s how my eating disorder
started back in high school. Now, I don’t deprive myself from all of the good
stuff (Sorry Rita). One reason I don’t is because IT’S GOOD and the other
reason is, it can be scary. When I notice myself saying “I shouldn’t eat
that” in my thoughts, it takes me back to my eating disorder. There is a
difference though, I am saying this about fast food, Oreos, candy etc...foods
that don’t help on the road to fitness! Before it was every single meal. There
is this balance between knowing that what I am doing is to become fit in a
healthy way and knowing I am not taking it too far. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Confident.</b><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Then there’s the people who make me question myself and what
I am doing. I ran somewhere the other day and when I walked in the door,
someone made the comment “you don’t need to run or workout, you’re already thin”.
Last week, I was at the gym and had two people say “Why are you here?!” like I
didn’t belong in the gym. These comments can really affect someone and their
fitness journey. It’s definitely affected mine! It makes me question myself
like, “Wait, I am doing this healthy lifestyle thing right?” or “Should
I not be working out?”, “Are other people at the gym thinking the same thing about me?”. Yes, I
may be naturally thin but I am trying to make the right choices to be a
healthier and happier version of myself. I am on this journey to be fit and
overall, feel better physically and emotionally each day. I have to be <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">confident</i> in myself and the choices I am
making each day regardless of the comments people say! I am confident! <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I refuse to stop making <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">the
choice. </i>I will<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i>keep the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">balance. </i>I am going to stay<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> confident</i>.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Find the Beauty</i>,</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Johannah Michale</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-85700668029511135702017-04-05T08:42:00.002-07:002017-04-05T18:24:02.550-07:00Those "Dang Onions"<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Helloooo... hello,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> So it has been a quick sec since I last blogged but that’s
okay, I am here now and super excited about it! I thought I would use this
blog as a way to share what I have been up to and where I am in life at this
very moment. I am currently sitting at my desk in the 6th grade classroom where I am students teachers after a long day of watching my students take the Iowa Assessments....sounds fun right?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> All jokes aside, I am over halfway through my student teaching
experience. Crazy to think about it but life is happening. It's happening real fast. To keep things (somewhat) short, I will start in January. I was at Kalona Elementary with 25
kindergarteners and let me tell you, that was a very eye opening experience to say the least. They impacted my teaching abilities don’t
get me wrong, but it was so much more than that. Those 25 kindergarteners
influenced my life in the most positive way, I learned more about myself than I
ever thought possible. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> I started out using the skills and knowledge I learned at
Iowa State as best as I could, but one thing I learned is that it is impossible
to teach someone classroom management in a college classroom. It was the one thing I was most nervous about walking into a classroom. Needless to say, those 25 students gave me
a run for my money and tested my patience. There were days I was discouraged
and frustrated. There were days where I thought I was invisible… (<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">seriously… some days, I thought about wearing
the caution yellow vest used for recess all day to keep these kids’ attention.)
</i>Putting all of that aside, there was one thing that NEVER happened. I never
wanted to stay home. Those kids impacted my life so greatly that I wanted to
come to school every day to see them. My cooperating teacher, Mrs. Billups
reminded me that every day is a new day; that tomorrow everything that happened
today won’t matter. When I learned this and kept this mentality, I woke up
happy and couldn’t wait to see and hear the funny things my students would do
that day <span style="font-family: "wingdings"; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span></span> I
miss those kids more than I ever thought possible. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> Moving into my 2<sup>nd</sup> 8 weeks of student teaching, I
started at the Washington Middle School in March. I currently have 3 weeks left
here and then I will graduate in May. (<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Whoa…
I have three weeks of college left. Yikes.) </i>I am in 6<sup>th</sup> Grade
Social Studies with a wonderful cooperating teacher. This placement is exciting
because I am able to put my social studies endorsement to use. My goal when specializing
in Social Studies was to make it more exciting for students and I feel like I
have done that (<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">at least I think I have!). </i>These students have also been challenging at times, but I am able to build
stronger relationships with them, plus use a little sarcasm...my favorite. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> I have continuously been looking for jobs and applying to
numerous places. I recently found out I will be the new Washington High School
Dance team coach for the 2017-2018 school year. Super pumped about this and
excited to put my dance abilities to use! Better yet, I received a phone call
yesterday that I was chosen for an interview for a teaching position I applied for.
I never realized how excited I would be when this happened! It was reassurance
that my resume stuck out and someone was interested in me and my abilities as an educator. It
also confirmed that schools have received my paperwork through Teachiowa too…. all the
teachers out there, you know the struggle!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> In addition to all of this, I am also competing for Miss
Iowa this coming June! I am super excited for this year and look forward
to the week with all of the other contestants. My platform is same as the last
two years, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Find the Beauty: </i>Anorexia
Nervosa and Prevention. This may be my platform for Miss Iowa but it is beyond
that. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Find the Beauty</i> is an everyday platform
and reminder to myself and everyone to look for the beauty in each and every
day. I have had numerous encounters with people who have been affected by an
eating disorder or struggle. I was just recently paired with a
student to discuss what they are going through as I went through the same
thing. I have also been working very closely with the
National Eating Disorder Association (NEDA). Though I cannot attend the Iowa City,
NEDA walk this year I have been helping as much I can! Currently looking for
raffle prizes, so if you know someone willing to donate a prize…<span style="font-family: "wingdings"; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span></span> I will be coordinating
a 3<sup>rd</sup> party event to raise money as well, stay tuned! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> I am raising money for the Children’s Miracle Network, one of my favorites! Having a niece and nephew both battling Congenital
Disorder of Glycosylation (CDG) type 1 they make many visits to the children's hospital and their chances for extended stays there are increased as well. The Children’s Miracle Network supports
the research, training, equipment and uncompensated care for them and all the miracle
children who need them. Having this personal connection really motivates me to
obtain the Children’s Miracle Maker Award for the 3 year in a row this year! I
will be having two fundraisers in the coming months, be on the look out and consider
making a donation, any amount helps! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> Okay… So I think I touched base on almost everything, so there
is my life in a nutshell. There are days when we get frustrated and stressed.
Certain situations give us a run for our money but we have to remember to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Find the Beauty. </i>Embrace those little
moments like getting an interview or that kid still (fake) crying because of
those “dang onions” that were on her pizza for dinner the night before. <span style="font-family: "wingdings"; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">ß</span></span> <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">yes, that happened. </i>These are the moments I live for and that keep
me going. What about you?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Have you found the beauty today?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">JohannahMichale</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-55138774965847802622016-05-03T20:23:00.000-07:002016-05-03T21:35:21.779-07:00Chemo Buddy.Hi there,<br />
You may have read one of my previous posts called "I Can Relate". If not that is okay, this is just somewhat of a follow up, so you may want to refer back and read that one quick :) The first paragraph talked about my mom being a breast cancer survivor, so today I am going to go into further detail about this story.<br />
At a young age, when I was in preschool my mom was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. At this age, I don't believe I knew the extent of the situation or what was actually going on. I don't remember everything as I was very young, but there are a few things that I do remember and hold near and dear to my heart.<br />
You may not believe me when I say this, but I remember the exact spot where my mom was standing when she grabbed ahold of her chest and gasped for air. My dad proceeded to ask her what was wrong and that's when my mom said, "I keep having this sharp pains in my chest". Now why I remember this moment, I am not sure but I also remember getting some sort of feeling as if my mom was in for something that wouldn't be fun. The stories and days in between are grey and fuzzy... I don't remember much but I also don't want to go into too much detail for the sake of my mom.<br />
I remember missing out dance and even some school. It was hard for my mom to take me to preschool and take part in chemo at the same time, so those days, I went with her. I remember knowing the doctors and them knowing me by name. I remember the purple popsicles that split into two, that my mom and myself would share. I remember spending those days barricaded in by the hospital curtain away from the rest of the world with just my mom. One of my greatest memories was when I went with my mom to a follow up appointment years later of being cancer free and one of the nurses remembered me. None of these memories really sank in until I became older and realized what was actually going on during this time and those days with my mom.<br />
As I got into high school, my mom wrote me a letter for a retreat I went to called COR (Christ in Others Retreat). In that letter she told me I was her light at the end of tunnel everyday when I was with her during chemo. She told me how I reminded her of all of us kids and we were the reason she kept fighting for her life. She called me her "Chemo Buddy". I remember her telling someone, if she wouldn't of had her "chemo buddy" she doesn't know how she would of made it. That gives me the greatest feeling of pride to know I stood by my mom like I did. I couldn't see the beauty in that then but I do now.<br />
Too many times, we don't appreciate the things our moms do and I'll be the first to admit that I'm one of those people. My mom does so much for me and our family. She doesn't receive the credit she deserves. She's one hell of a woman and is always putting others before herself. Being able to say I was her "Chemo Buddy" and having her as a mom is an honor and privilege. <br />
JohannahMichaleAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-63517659725664235502016-04-17T12:14:00.000-07:002016-04-17T12:15:09.661-07:00No Connection.<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I know I said I had blogs to follow my previous post but
I’ve recently had my beliefs challenged as to whether sororities and eating
disorders have a connection and I feel the need to write about it. When I sat
back and thought about this, it somewhat made me mad. The thought of my
sorority “causing” my eating disorder is just disturbing. Especially since my
personal experience was nothing close to that assumption. My sorority was part
of my support system. They held me accountable. They are still supporting me
now in my advocacy towards eating disorder prevention and awareness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">To anyone who thinks a sorority would cause an eating
disorder:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">A sorority IS a group of women who:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Build each other up</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Hold each other accountable</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Love one another</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Volunteer together</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Succeed together</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Have fun together</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Care for one another</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Look out for each other</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Support one another</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><br /></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">A sorority IS NOT a group of women who:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Tear each other down</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Cause their friends grief</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Are mean to one another</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Cause their friends to starve themselves</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Cause their friends to become malnourished</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Ruin each other’s self confidence</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">·<span style="font-size: 7pt; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Cause their friends to take part in a partial
hospitalization program</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">If anyone in a sorority takes part in the immoral actions I
just listed, shame on you. YOU may have caused the eating disorder, not the
sorority.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I am tired of there always being a negative connotation with
the word “sorority”. I’m especially disturbed when it’s connected to the words
eating disorder, something I personally struggled with. I do not believe a
sorority would cause an eating disorder, nor should it ever cause one. I wanted
the opportunity to bring a positive light towards sororities as most times
people seem to assume and think otherwise. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><span style="font-family: inherit;">With Love,</span></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><span style="font-family: inherit;"> Johannah Michale</span></o:p></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-68020816629303091392016-04-01T13:58:00.003-07:002016-04-01T15:23:34.339-07:00I Can Relate.<div class="MsoNormal">
Hi Everyone,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I know it’s
been a while but sometimes I write blogs and I’m not happy with the final
product. I try to put a lot of time and thought into my blogs. To do this, I
like to set aside a time to reflect, write, and just be in the moment. (I know that
sounds cheesy, but it’s true) Today my entire story is going to be put out on
the table. Before you continue to read, I want to you to take a moment and
realize I am writing this blog today to relate to people and show them they can
get through anything. Sometimes I find myself scared to share all of these
stories because I don’t want people to think I’m looking for attention or
sympathy. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Today’s post is going to be the
base for the blog posts to follow. I’ll touch on multiple moments in my entire
story, in future blog posts I will go more in depth on each one. Hopefully this
makes sense! If not, it will eventually I promise! So majority of you reading
this may or may not have read my previous posts on my page “Find the Beauty”.
Have you ever wondered where I came up with that title? I picked this title
because it connects to so many aspects of my life and can relate to anyone who
may be going through something difficult in their life. Based on my previous
posts, you know that I struggled with body image and an eating disorder. You
may not realize that my family and myself have gone through more than my eating
disorder. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
At a young age, my mom was
diagnosed with breast cancer. I was in preschool and yes at that time I didn’t
realize what exactly was happening but now looking back it was tough on my
family. I would say I missed quite a few days of preschool, as it was hard for
my mom to go to chemotherapy and be back to pick me up on time. Because of
this, I went with my mom to chemo. To this day, she will tell you I was her
“chemo buddy”. I could tell you so much more and so many more memories I have,
but I’m saving them for another post <span style="font-family: "wingdings"; mso-ascii-font-family: Cambria; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Cambria; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span></span>
This was the first and we were hoping the last time God would test our families
strength. <o:p></o:p></div>
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When I was in 6<sup>th</sup> grade
my oldest brother and biggest role model made the decision to drink and drive.
He was in a car accident involving two other people and was sent to prison for
5 years and was released in 2 1/2 because of good behavior. We can sit here and justify his decision deserved those years in
prison, he knew that himself considering he plead guilty but my family still
went through something I don’t wish upon any family. To watch my biggest role
model be handcuffed and taken away from me was the hardest thing to watch. One thing I'll never forget was how I had the opportunity to watch my brother own up to his mistake and become a
better man, friend, and brother because of it. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
The following year my dad was in a
farming accident where he fell 70 feet in a grain elevator due to a faulty
counter weight. I will never forget that day when my aunt Heidi came to my
school and told me to grab my coat and bag. I was headed to a hospital where
there was no guarantee my dad was still alive. To our surprise and the entire
community he did survive. Again, I could go into so much detail but I’ll save
my thoughts for a follow up post! <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
Throughout high school and even
into my college years is when I struggled with an eating disorder. At this
point, I thought God was out to get me. I thought I had done something wrong
because he was giving me yet another struggle. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’ve all heard about my personal battle, how
I overcame, the beauty I found in this situation but as you could probably
assumed, there will always be future posts about this.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
This past summer, we found out my
beautiful niece, Everlee was diagnosed with Congenital Disorder of
Glycosylation (CDG). You may not be familiar with CDG and that’s okay because
my family wasn’t either. It’s a very rare genetic disorder and when I say rare
I mean Everlee is 1 of 900 cases in the United States. Everlee is two years old
and simple motor skills such as grabbing objects and handing them to people is
challenging for her. She is doing fantastic with therapy and making tremendous
progress. A family friend told me the other day there is no greater family that
could love and support this little girl and the obstacles she’ll face everyday
than mine and I couldn’t agree more. Everlee will have a different life
compared to most kids but she has wonderful parents, siblings, aunts, uncles,
and grandparents that will beside her every step of the way. Please stay tuned
for my follow up blog regarding Everlee and CDG. We would love your help in
raising awareness. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
My family has been given some
obstacles but I truly believe God wouldn’t have given us anything we couldn’t
or can’t handle. We have all been given obstacles or struggles in our lives but
I’m here telling you about mine so you don’t feel alone in yours. We can all
relate to each other somehow. Finding the Beauty during these hard times can be
tough but if we’re all patient and look hard enough, we can find it. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> Love, </span>JohannahMichale<o:p></o:p></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-77976632106587628212016-03-03T08:32:00.001-08:002016-03-03T08:36:55.669-08:00National Eating Disorder Association (NEDA)<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">What’s new you may ask? The list could go on forever! I’ve
been up to a little bit of everything! All of which, I am going to share with
you here! Today I want to talk about the National Eating Disorder Association
(NEDA) Walk I am coordinating for this coming April! This is the 2<sup>nd</sup>
annual NEDA walk in Iowa City and the only NEDA walk in the state of Iowa! The
walk is going to be held on April 16<sup>th</sup> at Iowa City Park starting at
9:30. Our goal this year is to raise $10,000. Here is the link for the website,
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><a href="http://www.nedawalk.org/iowacity2016"><span style="background: white; color: #3b5998; font-size: 10.5pt;">www.nedawalk.org/iowacity2016</span></a>!
<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I have been working so hard towards
this walk and I would love your personal support! I encourage you to come and
participate! If you would like to register, here is the link, </span><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><a href="http://goo.gl/OrPpqS"><span style="background: white; color: #3b5998; font-size: 10.5pt;">http://goo.gl/OrPpqS</span></a>.
</span><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">We are looking for sponsors as well, please feel free to
contact me via e-mail: Johannah.vittetoe@gmail.com/Facebook if you would like
to sponsor or know anyone who would! We can’t make this NEDA walk happen
without sponsors! If you can’t participate in the walk and can’t be a sponsor I
still encourage you to donate to this amazing cause! Here’s the link to do so, </span><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><a href="http://goo.gl/blBX9s"><span style="background: white; color: #3b5998; font-size: 10.5pt;">http://goo.gl/blBX9s</span></a>.
</span><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I am currently working on my speech that I will share to the
entire community before the official walk begins! Seeing some familiar faces in
the crowd would be nice </span><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">
If you can’t do any of the things I’ve listed above, please like and share our
Iowa City NEDA walk Facebook page! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">NEDA is a phenomenal National
Organization that does so much for those struggling with eating disorders! I
have had the privilege to work with them and they have been the greatest help
and support system in making my wants and dreams happen with Eating Disorder
Advocacy!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>NEDA is currently giving me so
many opportunities and I am taking advantage of every single one! I am
coordinating this NEDA Walk, bringing Proud2BMe (an online eating disorder
community and support group/system) to Iowa State University’s Campus,
publishing my writing pieces to the Proud2BMe online community, I am a media
watchdog for NEDA, and currently going through training to be a NEDA Navigator!
NEDA Navigators </span><span style="background: white; color: #333333;">are volunteers who
have first-hand experience with eating disorders and are well into their own or
their loved one’s recovery. We have been trained by NEDA staff and clinical
advisors to be a knowledgeable, informal source of guidance to others.</span><span style="font-size: 10pt;"> </span><span style="background: white; color: #333333;">I
am so excited about all of these opportunities and can’t wait to share my experiences
with you here on my blog! Please stay tuned and keep finding the beauty! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">JohannahMichale</span></span><span style="font-family: "times"; font-size: 10.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-2773447572702022992016-02-18T21:07:00.002-08:002016-03-03T08:36:43.266-08:00I Found the Beauty Within My Letters. <div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="text-indent: 0.5in;">How is everyone? </span><span style="text-indent: 0.5in;">I’m just getting
through my classes, starting my field experience for my elementary education
major, and trying to overcome this awful cold. Aside from that, I want to talk about my
sorority today. Too many times, people are so quick to judge when they hear I am in a
sorority. I am a member of Delta Delta Delta, some of you may or may not know
the name. You may have heard some negative stereotypes or maybe you’ve heard we
raise thousands of dollars for our philanthropy with St. Jude Children’s Research
Hospital and Clinics. I want to talk about one of the many things that stood
out to when I was considering Tri-Delta and now being apart of it, what has impacted me the most. </span></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
When I was going through primary
recruitment and I was struggling with my eating disorder and body image. I
remember having a conversation with a friend of mine on how I didn’t know if I
could do this whole sorority thing. I remember telling my friend how I’ll never
get into a house competing against all of these amazingly beautiful and
confident girls. She told me, she didn’t know if it was a good idea for me
either. She didn’t want me putting myself down anymore than I already was. This
all changed when I walked into the door of 302 Ash Avenue. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
Tri-Delta nationally participates
in a movement called Fat Talk Free Week. When I heard about this, I knew this
was the house for me. It was the house I needed at that very point in my
life. Fat Talk Free Week is a weeklong event where all of us sisters hold each
other accountable. We put positive post-it notes all around the house and on
the mirrors. We promote positive body image, have guest speakers, and
participate in fun activities as well. I wasn’t allowed to say one negative
thing about myself. If I did, one of my sisters would call me out. It wasn’t
just this week my sisters did this for me; it was all of the time. <o:p></o:p></div>
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My sophomore year I was finally
comfortable enough to tell a few of my sorority sisters what I was going
through. I was scared to tell them, but I am so happy that I did. They were the
first people I told, they were the ones who made me realize it was all going to
be okay. I never knew someone could have my back like these girls did. They
called me out when I wasn’t eating, they hid the scales from me, and made sure
I had the support I needed when I was struggling. They were my rock. Too many
times, people don’t see the beauty in sorority letters. I have been lucky
enough to find the beauty in mine and I am so grateful for that. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
Tri-Delta has given more than what
people probably realize. The very moment I told those girls in 2<sup>nd</sup>
Add what I was going through is a moment I will never forget. They were my
first step to recovery and I could never thank these girls enough for what they
did for me that year. They will always have a special place in my heart. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Delta Love and All Mine, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
JohannahMichale <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-26766456663578665722016-01-21T12:52:00.000-08:002016-01-22T09:50:38.317-08:00Thank You.<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> College. All I have to say is I can definitely tell the difference
between my current 400 level classes compared to the classes I took my freshman
year. Man, if only I could go back. Between Christmas break where I was trying
to get non-school work done, to my current school work, my apartment having to
replace 3 pipes in our bathrooms. Yes, I said Bathroom(S), and to top it off my
apartment just had a main pipe back up and our toilets, bathtub, and shower
overflowed into our apartment with sewage water. Needless to say I've been
dealing with a lot of poop lately (no pun intended). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 13.5pt;">Enough with the negative stuff!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"> I am so happy to be blogging again and to be writing to all of
you. I've been able to find the beauty in my days because of so many of you,
even in the times of struggle and stress. This is what I want to write about
today. Instead of trying to impact you, I want to share with you some of the
many ways all of you have impacted me. Beyond sharing them with you, I want to
thank you. </span><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">There are so many moments and people I could mention and thank but
here are just a few:</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> -To all of you reading this or who have read my previous blog
posts, thank you. I have lost count on the amount of people who have reached
out to me and told me I’ve impacted them and to keep writing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> -Thank you to the people who have taken time out of their days to
thank me for sharing my story because it helped them see the light at the end
of the tunnel in their fight against an eating disorder. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> -To the girls who are struggling with body image that have reached
out to me for advice and encouragement! Thank you all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"> -Thank you to my friends and family who have read my blogs and
shared them with friends and family.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> -To an Iowa State Advisor for taking time out of your day to
ask about Miss Iowa and my platform. I was able to share a special moment with
her because her daughter has struggled and battled with this mental illness. Thank
you for encouraging and praising my choice to share my story that day.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> -My Tri-Delta Sisters, I want to thank the girls in the house
who allowed me to open up while I was struggling. These girls were the first
people I ever trusted enough to actually talk about what I was going through.
Thank you to those who recognized when I struggling even when I thought I
wasn’t and for holding me accountable.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> -Thank you to a couple important guys in my life. I want to
take a second to thank AJ for trying his best to understand when I talk about
this very uncomfortable topic for most. Your work ethic, passion, and drive motivate
me every single day in this crazy thing called life. Your support doesn’t go
unnoticed. To the other man in my life, my dad. Even though he probably won’t
read this I still want to give him the credit he deserves. When I was
struggling he was worried. He wouldn’t tell me but he would show me. He bribed
me with my favorite restaurants. I remember one time he took me to a movie and
then to Red Lobster just to see me eat. This past year, I told him I wanted a
Krispy Kreme Donut at the end of Miss Iowa week and when he couldn’t find one
within miles of Davenport, I think he was more bummed about it than I was. His
little tough love comments pushed me and motivated me more than he’ll ever
know. His continuous love and support is overflowing and I couldn’t be more
grateful. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> -Thank you to a friend who recently reached out to be about
her friend struggling and asking how she can better understand and help her.
This friend of mine stated that she was “sorry” just in case her asking about this subject was
“uncomfortable”. This moment made me write this blog and reminded me of something. Something I told her, “This is why I
started sharing my story!”. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> -Yes, at first the idea of sharing my story was
“uncomfortable”. I was scared people would judge me or think I was just doing
this to get attention. Mariah Cary (no…not the singer, but a very good friend)
was the very first person to encourage me to share my story. Mariah is the one
who told me it was going to be okay. She told me I could impact so many people and
I want to thank her for that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> -Thank you to my sister, Jenahlee. She was the person that told
me to “Go for it”. She was the first person I called when I made the decision
to start sharing my story. She was nothing but supportive when I asked for her
opinion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was still feeling a little
uneasy about it and her words that night are what made me do this. Her outside
point of view on eating disorders and continuous support has helped
tremendously. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> -My Mom was worried about me sharing my story at first but
after seeing how far I’ve come I think we can both agree Miss Iowa and the
platform it’s given me to share my story has been a true blessing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With that being said, I want to thank my Mom.
Not only for her unconditional love but also for her support beyond what anyone
else has or can see. When I was struggling, she was the one who encouraged different
ideas that could motivate me to become healthy, the Miss Iowa Scholarship
Program for example. She is the one who has held me accountable and supported
me. Yes, her tough love was most definitely tough sometimes but it was her who has
been by my side every step of the way. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> -I am going to admit even saying the word Anorexia was hard
to say with confidence at first. But ever since I opened the book of my story
for everyone to read, you all have been nothing but encouraging. Nothing but
supportive and I can’t thank you enough. The moments I just previously shared
with you are what got me and keep me going. They keep me motivated to find the
beauty everyday and to keep sharing about it. All of your support and kind
words remind me why I started sharing my story and let me know I am helping and
impacting more people than I ever thought possible. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">Thank you for that. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">With love, JohannahMichale</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-78648150413762006772015-12-11T08:47:00.002-08:002015-12-11T11:52:25.213-08:00Need, Want, Love. <div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
Being a college student has been
consuming my life! Between the stress of quizzes, readings, notes, and now
studying for those horrifying finals, I needed a little break. A brain break,
so I’m writing to all of you. Funny how the topic of today’s post came to me
though, I had to watch a documentary for one of my classes. It was called “Miss
Representation”. Long story short, it discussed a lot of social media and how
social media is portraying women and their bodies. This is carrying over to
women across the world and how they feel they are only worthy based on their
body. This obviously hit home for me as the documentary started with girls
discussing their eating disorders and how they feel they are only worth what
their body portrays. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
We all need to be needed. We all
want to be wanted. We love to be loved. Speaking on my own behalf, I felt like all
those things couldn’t happen if my body wasn’t the way guys wanted or wasn’t
attractive. Too many times men (not all men) say they’ll love us for who we are
or don’t want us to look like those Victoria Secret Models and yes, some will
mean it. But other times this is really hard to believe when they are telling
us to gain weight if we’re too skinny, hinting at working out, wishing we had
bigger boobs or a nicer butt, or better yet, we’re wiping the drool from their
faces as they watch the Victoria Secret Fashion Show. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
There is so much pressure in this
world for us to look a certain way. It is hard to not give in and all of a
sudden feel like we aren’t good enough. Think about it, how many made those
“fat jokes” during the Victoria Secret Fashion show or how many girls said
something negative about themselves? I'm not shaming those models by any means, a lot of those girls workout really hard to stay in the shape they are, it's their job! But the way girls are allowing these outside influences affect them makes me sick. <b>Your worth does not lie
in the way your body looks. </b>What happened to being happy in your own skin?
Being confident with what God gave us? Why are we constantly wishing to be like other girls? I’m sure those girls we wish we looked like are wishing something different about themselves. I used to wish so many
things about myself were different. We all need to stop wishing and start
embracing! You are you, and no one is like you. Embrace that. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
We all need to be needed. We all
want to be wanted. We love to be loved. As nice and amazing it is to have all
of those from someone else we need to give it to ourselves first. Outside influences,
don’t mean anything. <span style="text-indent: 0.5in;">Need yourself, want yourself, and
love yourself. Find the beauty in yourself and love it. You are human and you
need to be loved, just like everything else in this world.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span>
<span style="text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span><span style="text-indent: 0.5in;">Love, JohannahMichale</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-53341855385247792832015-11-25T10:00:00.004-08:002015-11-25T10:02:24.520-08:00Only You Have the Power<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="text-indent: 0.5in;">I’m going to try to be a little
more positive in this blog compared to my last one. It may not have been the
most chipper post but I had a lot of amazing feedback. My last blog touched a
lot of people and those people reached out to me. When I hear the positive
feedback from all of you readers… it’s what keeps me going. Your kind words and
encouragement is what motivates me everyday to keep sharing my story to help
more people than I ever thought possible. You are all helping me find the
beauty in my everyday life.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
On that note, today I want to talk about
seeing the beauty in others and finding it within ourselves. We can all admit
we’ve said something bad about one person or another, myself included. Easier
said than done, we need to stop doing this. What do we gain from tearing other
people down? I don’t see the point. Over the course of the last few years I’ve
learned what it feels like to not be “enough”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
I believed what everyone else said
and how he or she made me feel about myself. This is why I didn’t feel like I
was “enough”. I let negative people and their negative thoughts and words
manipulate how I felt about myself. You can’t let other people control how you
feel about yourself. You have to do it yourself. You have to believe in
yourself and believe you are enough. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
You could be struggling with an
eating disorder or something as simple as an argument with a friend, a
boyfriend, or maybe a family member. Whatever the case may be, we tend to turn
to other people to feel better right? We want love and comfort to know we
aren’t ridiculous, “crazy”, worthless or not enough, right? So your friends and
family proceed to build you up and try and make you feel better... But these
amazing things they are saying about you aren’t helping right? It’s because you
don’t believe the words being said to you…but yet you’ll believe the negative
things people say to you?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
Why do we allow people to
manipulate how we feel about ourselves negatively but not positively? This is
something I have learned. Only I have the power to control how I feel about
myself. It’s my choice and my power to pick and choose what I want to believe
about myself. I personally know I put other people’s wants and happiness before
my own when they are important to me. I know I have amazing goals and
accomplishments to be proud of. I know I have an amazing family and friends. It
took me while to find all of this and yes, I had people who made the process difficult
but I found all of this beauty in my life. I, Johannah found it, no one found
it for me and no one is going to take it away from me because I’m not going to
give them the power to do so. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Don’t be the person hindering
someone’s ability to see and find their own beauty. Be the person who see’s the
beauty in everyone and points them in the direction to find it. I challenge you
to not believe those negative people, don’t listen to the negative thoughts
people put in your mind, and pay more attention to those trying to guide you in
finding your own beauty. But just remember; only you have the power to find the
beauty within yourself. So go find it. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
JohannahMichale </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-24076902454047529232015-11-13T12:15:00.002-08:002015-11-13T12:19:56.846-08:00If My Eating Disoder Could Talk<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Good Morning Johannah, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"> Time to wake up! Another day to strengthen that fear of becoming fat. Oh, you need to go to the bathroom and brush your teeth? Well first, stop. Stop and look in the mirror. Pull up your shirt and look at the size of your waste. Do you want it getting any bigger than that? I didn't think so. Now... put your feet together and look at the size of your thighs. Very good. I can see that sandwich you ate last night, can't you? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"> Ahh, breakfast time. Your stomach is telling your hungry but I'm telling you that you're not. You don't need the pancakes, bacon, cereal, or a granola bar for that matter. You can still see what you ate on your body from yesterday. Lets not add on to that. Let's go about this Saturday and try to act like I don't exist. Which we both know it impossible but It'll be fun for me and a living hell for you. That's one of my hobbies, making your life miserable. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"> I'm going to control you. I'm going to take over your life. You're going to listen to me and only me. If you try to listen to anyone else, they won't understand. They'll make you gain weight. They will shove food down your throat, is that what you want? No, so listen to me. I am going to take over your daily life. I'm going to take your energy, your confidence, your health, your hair, your ability to see yourself as everyone else does. That doesn't sound fun to you? Well would you rather be fat? Yeah, that's what I thought.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"> So, you have a basketball game today? Mom wants you to eat that sandwich before you can go into the school. Alright, I'll cut you a deal. You can eat half of the sandwich but not the crust. That's enough to put something in your stomach and please your mom but not enough to make you fat. Why are you self-concious to get undressed in the locker room? You're skinny, that's what you want right? Oh.... I know... It's that one girl who makes the rude comments and pinches your waste calling you "so skinny" in that baby voice. Well take it as compliment, at the end of the day, at least she isn't calling you fat. You ask your mom to go and hang out with your friends after the game and she proceeds to tell you, "your not going anywhere until you eat something, I saw the other half of your sandwich in the trash can". All of this happening in front of your friends. That sad and disappointed look on your face satisfies me. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"> You can't get rid of me. While no one else in this world is understanding nor being here for you... I am. I will always be here. As much as you want to stop doing this to yourself, I won't let you. Your family may be trying to help and a few friends here and there, but I'll never go away. Ever. Family, friends, sports, college... none of these have helped you. I may have disappeared a couple times but I'm always going to be here.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"> So, how is a pageant thing your doing going to help you? You can't be serious. Miss Iowa is not going to save you, you're kidding yourself if you beleive that! Well fine, go ahead and try, it's not going to work. You really think gaining your confidence back and finding the person you want to be is going to help you? You believe inspiring others by sharing your struggle with myself, is going to keep from listening to me?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">..... It has? What do mean it has? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Sincerely, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"> Johannah's Eating Disorder</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> I'm sorry if that was a little too much for some of you. But that's one of the best ways I can put it into persepective for you. It wasn't easy, especially when I decided to stop listening. I want to thank the Miss Iowa Program for motivating me, giving me this opportunity, and helping me truly finding myself. M</span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">y friends who held and keep holding me accountable. Your friendship and unconditional love never go unnoticed. To m</span><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">y family for being the first to acknowledge I had a problem. To my mom and dad, who I know were in denial but tried their best to help and understand every day and continue to support me in every step I take. To my sisters(in-laws), who even though they didn't know it, gave me a goal to reach and that was to be just like them. I can only hope I grow up to be half the people they are. To my brothers, who always saw and still see the best in me and taught me how to be tough and work hard for what I want. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"> Everyting has beauty but not everyone can see it. I couldn't see my own beauty at the time but everyone else could and without them I would have never been able to find it myself. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">JohannahMichale</span><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-42945504050021086862015-11-06T10:28:00.000-08:002015-11-06T12:33:51.494-08:00HOPE: Hold On Pain Ends<span style="font-family: inherit;"> In my last post I finished by saying I found the beauty in my life right? Well I wanted to touch on that today... Finding that beauty was not easy. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done. Battling an eating disorder was not something I wanted or chose to do. Anorexia Nervosa is a mental illness. It has the highest fatality rate of any mental illness I might add. With that being said, my case was minor compared to some people who struggle with eating disorders but that doesn't mean it was any easier. </span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> I was and still am a perfectionist at times. I like to be the best person I can be at all times. In high school, I wanted to be the best athlete, student, daughter, sister, friend, girlfriend, dancer that I could be. I wanted control of every single aspect in my life. There was one moment that stuck with me, that still sticks with me but this moment changed everything. One of my friends said me, "Johannah, if there is any flaw on you, it would just be your love handles". Okay, now some of you may be thinking a million different things right now. If you know me, you know that God made me naturally thin and that I never had love handles. Maybe you're wondering why this friend would ever say that to me or why I would let it get to me? My friend did not say this to be mean or put me down in any way! She didn't take time to realize that my rib cage was smaller than my hips and this is what made it look like I had these "love handles", she also didn't have a filter. As for letting this comment get to me? I already told you. I was a perfectionist. This comment was the biggest stab to my self confidence and I was now determined to get rid of these "love handles" she was talking about.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> So...I went on a "diet". I told myself I would start eating healthier, push myself harder in my sport workouts, and gain this "perfect" body. Well this turned into me just not eating anymore. Eventually this started to impact every other aspect in my life. I was gradually becoming less of the person I wanted and always strived to be. Having control over everything was gradually slipping through my fingers. I was losing the energy to go to school and be the best athlete I could be. I felt like I was losing the connection with my family because I didn't think they'd understand. I mean didn't expect people to understand but when I have one girl making comments about my body in dance costumes, the locker room, and handing me food to eat I lost all hope. I didn't want anyone to know or to help. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> Eventually it all turned into a fear. The fear of gaining weight. <span style="font-size: 11pt;">I was
overwhelmed with constant questioning on how someone like myself who is
naturally thin, could possibly be struggling with body image. It was all in my mind, I couldn't help it. All of you are scared of something; snakes, mice, or spiders maybe? Well what if I asked you "why" or what if I told you to "just stop" being scared of your fear you wouldn't be able to explain or do it, would you? Well my fear of gaining weight was just like your fears. I couldn't explain why I was scared nor just instantly stop. W</span><span style="font-size: 11pt;">hen I started to lose my hair and my obsession with being thin took over much of my daily life, eating
habits and thoughts, I knew it was time to get help.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"> I struggled for many years and always asked the question, "Why?". Why me, why can't I get over this and stop, why would God do this to me? The list of "Why" questions went on forever. It truly wasn't until I found my niche, the Miss Iowa program, that I found the answers. If God put me to it, then he'd see me through it and he did! He brought me to this amazing organization, that quite frankly changed my life. Miss Iowa and my platform "Anorexia Nervosa: <b>H</b>old <b>O</b>n <b>P</b>ain <b>E</b>nds" is one of my biggest motivations. Going out and sharing my story to help others motivates me because I want the story I'm sharing to have a happy ending; that I overcame my eating disorder. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"> I didn't become the person I am right this second easily. It was hard and challenged more than I ever thought possible. Would I go through it all again? Not going to lie...it's sounds awful but... I would do it. Everything has beauty but not everyone can see it. I'm now one of those people who can see the beauty in my days and life because of this struggle. To find the beauty, I needed HOPE. I <b>H</b>eld <b>O</b>n and I can now say the <b>P</b>ain has <b>E</b>nded. I challenge you to have HOPE today. In whatever it is you're struggling with; an eating disorder, school, a boyfriend, a friendship, job. Hold on because the pain will end, maybe not right this second but eventually. <b>Find the Beauty</b>, you wont't regret it, I promise. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">JohannahMichale</span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1773094837572030838.post-72341423260785461622015-11-02T18:59:00.004-08:002015-11-02T19:51:29.586-08:00Everything Has BeautyHi there,<br />
First off I'd like to say thank you for taking time out of your busy day and life to read about mine. I'm new to the blogger world and I am beyond excited to get this thing up and going. Some of you may or may not know me but I'd still like to share a little about myself. To begin, my name is Johannah Vittetoe. I've grown up on a farm in small town Iowa. I am the youngest child in my family or as everyone else likes to call it "the baby". I grew up playing with American Girl dolls, dancing, playing school, cutting the lace off my girly socks because that wasn't "cool", and wearing those red lined superman underwear with my older brother Joel. As I got older I kept dancing and eventually started playing sports like Basketball and Volleyball. Now being in college at Iowa State University, I'm in involved in a lot as well. I am a member of Delta Delta Delta Sorority, Love Your Melon Volunteer group, Dance Marathon, and Body Image and Eating Disorder Assosication. Beginning last February I began a new chapter in my life and decided to push myself outside of my comfort zone. I made the choice to take part in the Miss Iowa Scholarship Program and it was one of the greatest decisions of my life. What I have gained from this program over the course of the last 8 months is incredible. It's made me who I am this very second and helped me find something I am very passionate about. Helping others. I found... (as I like to call it) my niche. This program has given me the opportunity and confidence where I can now share my story of how I battleED Anorexia Nervosa. I am now healthy and happier than ever and I have to credit the Miss Iowa Scholarship Program for this. Miss Iowa has given me a platform to help more people than I ever thought possible. This platform has motivated me to BECOME and STAY healthy and I am forever grateful for that. With all of that being said, I am now ready to share my story and experiences to the world in hopes to help others in their struggle. Everything has beauty, but not everyone can see. I found the beauty in my life, now I want you to find yours.<br />
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-JohannahMichale<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18140740874702378787noreply@blogger.com0