Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Chemo Buddy.

Hi there,
   You may have read one of my previous posts called "I Can Relate". If not that is okay, this is just somewhat of a follow up, so you may want to refer back and read that one quick :) The first paragraph talked about my mom being a breast cancer survivor, so today I am going to go into further detail about this story.
   At a young age, when I was in preschool my mom was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. At this age, I don't believe I knew the extent of the situation or what was actually going on. I don't remember everything as I was very young, but there are a few things that I do remember and hold near and dear to my heart.
   You may not believe me when I say this, but I remember the exact spot where my mom was standing when she grabbed ahold of her chest and gasped for air. My dad proceeded to ask her what was wrong and that's when my mom said, "I keep having this sharp pains in my chest". Now why I remember this moment, I am not sure but I also remember getting some sort of feeling as if my mom was in for something that wouldn't be fun. The stories and days in between are grey and fuzzy... I don't remember much but I also don't want to go into too much detail for the sake of my mom.
   I remember missing out dance and even some school. It was hard for my mom to take me to preschool and take part in chemo at the same time, so those days, I went with her. I remember knowing the doctors and them knowing me by name. I remember the purple popsicles that split into two, that my mom and myself would share. I remember spending those days barricaded in by the hospital curtain away from the rest of the world with just my mom. One of my greatest memories was when I went with my mom to a follow up appointment years later of being cancer free and one of the nurses remembered me. None of these memories really sank in until I became older and realized what was actually going on during this time and those days with my mom.
   As I got into high school, my mom wrote me a letter for a retreat I went to called COR (Christ in Others Retreat). In that letter she told me I was her light at the end of tunnel everyday when I was with her during chemo. She told me how I reminded her of all of us kids and we were the reason she kept fighting for her life. She called me her "Chemo Buddy". I remember her telling someone, if she wouldn't of had her "chemo buddy" she doesn't know how she would of made it. That gives me the greatest feeling of pride to know I stood by my mom like I did. I couldn't see the beauty in that then but I do now.
   Too many times, we don't appreciate the things our moms do and I'll be the first to admit that I'm one of those people. My mom does so much for me and our family. She doesn't receive the credit she deserves. She's one hell of a woman and is always putting others before herself. Being able to say I was her "Chemo Buddy" and having her as a mom is an honor and privilege.

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